2002-01-09 | 10:50 p.m.
it was a beautiful day

he infiltrated my dreams. i bet he’d be proud of himself...

i went to see him. he lived in these apartments that looked like something out of london during the industrial revolution. i got lost because they all looked the same, but then i heard him tell me where to go… like we were on the phone, but i had no phone. we watched cartoons and played with legos all morning. i built a house, and he built a cockatiel. then we went up on the roof. it was sunny, and we could see a harbor and the ocean all blue like cornflowers speckled with white sailboats. he put his arm around me as a yellow angelfish swam across the sky. the wind blew my hair across my face, and he brushed it away. i kissed him on the spot where his face meets his neck, and he held me closer. we watched the sun set.

i wish i could sleep forever. (not really)

when i woke up and tried to get out of bed, i couldn’t stand up because my legs were still asleep. i think i was trying to stay with him.

it was warm today—must’ve been over 40 degrees—so i wore a skirt. this caused everybody to freak out because i don’t do it often, but it’s always cold, and wearing a skirt when it’s cold is highly unpleasant. one of the managers asked me if i was going for a job interview somewhere else (he seemed concerned, which was very flattering). plus, one of the boys i’d been trying to avoid, (the one who gave me roses) came up to me and told me how good i looked and how nice i smelled and asked when i was gonna let him take me snowboarding. i think won’t be dressing up again for a while.

the whole skirt experience reminds me of a conversation i had with my beloved brother-in-law, brian. i mentioned the fact that i hate wearing dresses when it’s cold, and that i think it’s wrong to ask girls to do this. he then piped in, “ i think it’s very classy when a woman wears a nice dress or a skirt.” what a prick! it was everything i could do not to kick him in the shin. hard. this may seem like an overreaction to a harmless comment, but if you knew him, you’d understand that this was an intentional jab. he was very directly implying that he thinks i am without class. then i remembered that i don’t like him and that i never agree with his opinions anyway, and i let it go (enough not to kick him, that is, but not enough to not rant about it when i get the chance).

well, this entry went from smarm to fumes in a hurry… i know. i know. i’m just talented like that. (and now to sarcasm)